When Life Shifts: Walking Through Transition

This week's blog post is a little different from my usual ones - I just want to take a moment to be fully vulnerable with you.

Change and transition are hard. No matter how you slice it - whether you saw it coming or not - they're hard. As TCKs, I think we often fall into the trap of believing that the more transitions we go through, the easier they should become. And sure, you might grow more adaptable or flexible. But I don't think transition ever stops being hard, no matter how many times you've faced it.

I graduated from college in May, and honestly, nothing prepared me for the transition from college life to a full-time job. People don't talk about it enough, and it's far from easy. In college, my attention was constantly divided between classes, work, activities and friends. My days had natural breaks where I could grab lunch with a friend, take a nap, or hit the gym. My new job is nothing like that.

When I started working at my church, I told myself: "Karis, you've done this a hundred times. Transition is nothing new - you've got this." But the adjustment hit me like a bus.

My first week, I was exhausted every single day, even though my workload wasn't overwhelming. Where I used to think my evenings were just getting started at 10 PM, suddenly I couldn't keep my eyes open past 8:30. I wanted to see friends but couldn't imagine staying out late and then waking up early for work. It all felt so new and foreign to me. I love my job, but I hated that part of the adjustment.

By week 2, I felt a little less tired and thought, "Okay, transition period over - smooth sailing ahead." Wrong again. (Are you sensing a theme?)

One evening I had to stay late for a prayer night. My day had been long, but manageable and still enjoyable. Then my car broke down that morning, and by the time I was on the phone with my dad about it, I found myself on the verge of tears. I couldn't believe it - why was I falling apart over something so small? But suddenly I was in tears, overwhelmed by everything.

That moment made me realize: I had done such a good job convincing myself that this transition would be easy, that I ignored all the signals my body was giving me. I kept telling myself I was fine when I wasn't.

And I'll be honest - I've beat myself up for not handling this better. Thoughts like:

• "You're a terrible friend - you're too tired to even spend time with people after work."

• "You've moved across the ocean multiple times, and now a job in the same city you've lived in for 4 years is what breaks you?"

• "Transition should be the thing you're best at - why are you struggling so much?"

Maybe you've had those kinds of thoughts too.

I wish I could tell you there's a magic fix for moments like these. There isn't. But what I can tell you is this: there's no shame in admitting that transition is still hard, even if you've been through it before. When you open up and share your struggles, it gives people around you permission to support you - and there's nothing sweeter than that.

As I was processing this, the Lord prompted me to read about the resurrection and ascension of Jesus in the Gospels (specifically, John 20-21 and Acts 1). Think about the disciples. They had just watched Jesus - who they had spent every day with for 3 years - be killed in the most horrific way possible. Then, 3 days later, He rose again! And just as they were wrapping their minds around that, Jesus told them He was leaving again but would send the Holy Spirit. Can you imagine the rollercoaster of emotions? Talk about transition.

In Acts 1:14 it says, "They all joined together constantly in prayer, along with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brothers." After everything they had just been through, their response was to pray together in community.

It's easy to throw out the phrase "just pray about it," but I think we underestimate how powerful prayer really is - especially when others pray with and for us. It changes things.

So if I can leave you with one encouragement, it's this: you don't have to handle transition on your own. You won't handle it perfectly, so don't set that expectation for yourself. Remember, Jesus and His disciples, faced more transition and change than almost anyone. Jesus understands. He sees you. He's with you - jumping for joy in the highs and sitting and weeping with you in the lows.