Starting College (or a New Semester) as a TCK: Finding Your Footing in a New World

For many people, heading off to college or starting a new semester means moving a few hours away from home, maybe across the country. For Third Culture Kids (TCKs), it often means something a little different. Maybe you've just stepped off a plane from halfway around the world, or you're beginning school in a place that technically counts as your "passport country" but feels foreign in all the ways that matter.

Starting a new academic year always comes with its mix of excitement and nerves. But when you add in layers of cultural transition, hidden grief, and the constant TCK question of "Where do I actually belong?" - the start of college or a new year can feel overwhelming.

If that's you right now, you're not alone. Here are a few thoughts as you begin this new chapter:

1. It's Okay That This Doesn't Feel Like "Home"

Everyone around you might talk about going "home" for the holidays or finding comfort food from their childhood. For you, those things might be oceans away. Instead of forcing yourself to fit into those expectations, give yourself permission to define "home" differently. It might be a WhatsApp call with friends abroad, the music you grew up with, or a recipe that connects you to your life abroad.

2. Create Small Anchors of Familiarity

Transitions feel less overwhelming when you can build pockets of familiarity. Maybe that means decorating your dorm room with photos from different countries, finding a cafe that reminds you of the one you used to hang with friends at overseas, or listening to a podcast in your "heart language." Anchors don't replace what you left, but they steady you while you're learning new rhythms.

3. Don't Be Afraid to Share Your Story - But Don't Feel Like You Have to Lead With It

You'll meet lots of new people this semester. Some will ask where you're from. You might find yourself stumbling, unsure how to answer in one sentence. That's okay. Your story is layered and complex, and it doesn't have to be explained all at once. Share when it feels right, and remember: you're more than just your TCK background. You're also a student, a friend, an explorer, a learner.

4. Pay Attention to Hidden Grief

New beginnings often resurface old goodbyes. You might find yourself missing friends from your last school or aching for the foods and festivals you've left behind. Don't dismiss that as weakness - it's part of your resilience story. Journaling, talking with a trusted friend, or even finding a counselor can give space for that grief to breathe.

5. Lean Into Curiosity

You're already practiced at observing, adapting, and asking good questions - that's part of your TCK toolkit. Let those skills help you connect with new people, learn new traditions, and explore this new environment. Curiosity doesn't erase the hard parts, but it can turn some of the unknowns into discoveries.

6. Remember You're Not Alone

There are other TCKs on your campus or in your community, even if you haven't met them yet. Many universities also have international student groups, global clubs, or cultural associations that might feel more like home than you expect. And beyond that, there's a whole online community of TCKs (myself included!) cheering you on.

A Final Word

Starting college - or a new academic year - is no small thing. I know I had so many reservations and questions going into it. But you've done "new" before, probably more times than you can count. The same resilience and creativity that helped you navigate airports, languages, and cultural shifts can carry you into this season too.

But, at the same time, it is more than okay to admit that you're struggling despite your familiarity with "newness" and transitions. Just because you have done something 100 times, doesn't mean you do it perfectly the 101st time. Its okay to not be okay.